Saturday, December 27, 2008

Christmas 2008

Something is just not right this year and I can't put a finger on it. We have a real Christmas tree that miraculously smells like pines (out last two trees did not), we have snow all over and really the makings of a perfect Christmas. But still, it just did not feel like Christmas. Something was missing and for the life of me I cannot figure out what.

Maybe it's the gloom and doom that is prevalent everywhere - I mean, how depressing is it to know that Woolworths is closing down after 100 years - or maybe it's more depressing to know that our stupid govt is going to spend more money we do not have to bail out an auto industry whose cars no one wants to buy - at the expense of my daughters future. Everywhere I go things are just not Christmassy. Christmas is a time of laughter and happiness, yet I feel burdened. I just don't see the spirit this year.

And it's not like we haven't tried. I mean, my dear friends came over on Christmas and we cooked up quite a feast with a goose and all the sides - the goose took far too long to cook, and it was way to tough (I realised I had bought a Mennonite Free Range one - apparently the ones cooped up in cages would have made better meals). But in spite of the trials and tribulations of one ex-chef (my friend Ed) and another ex-sous chef (me) and a support team of 2 ambitious home cooks (my friends Gab and Cat) - and a meal that after 6 hours gave us a proper meal and over which we did laugh - I still did not find the Christmas spirit.

It was probably me. I am way too tired these days. The burden of the path ahead looks even more heavy and under all this strain I find I have sadly totally lost my sense of humour. My friend Emy is correct when she says I need to learn to say "No "more often and stop trying to accommodate everyone. The toll of doing that is costing me the season's spirit.